Hey guys, I couldn’t decide which of these movies I wanted to watch this morning so I decided to watch both of them! They’re both definitely a little lighter than stuff that I’d usually cover here but that doesn’t mean they fit any less. These movies blend the elements of extreme horror with a little bit of humor and it really gives them value beyond shock factor. So, without further adieu I give you this week’s installment of Fucked Up Fridays I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
DEAR GOD NO!
The Impalers are the baddest motherfuckers on two wheels; they are the one percent of the one percent. After a falling out with their crime syndicate, they need some extra cash so they decide to pull a home invasion on the richest person they can find in the area. That person happens to be a disgraced anthropologist with more than a few dark secrets.
This is one of the movies that Korey Jordan recommended to us a couple weeks back during our interview with him. It came up in a conversation about the balance of humor and extreme elements that gives a movie some rewatch value. Dear God No! is an excellent example of how well this balance can work. This movie was fucked up, bloody, violent, weird, and funny as hell and if I’m being completely honest with you, I’m looking forward to giving it a second watch.
Dear God No! is an excellent example of a modern exploitation film but it brings a little extra to the table as well. There’s blood, Nazis (neo and original flavor), more nudity than you can shake a fully automatic rifle at, strippers with fully automatic rifles, a sex crazed zombie-ish woman, and bikers. I mean, really, what’s not to like?
The thing I like most about this movie is how it takes things that should be really fucked up and injects a bit of humor into it. For instance, a kid goes to take a piss and comes back to find that his mother has been slaughtered by marauding outlaw bikers. From the amount of blood you see, it wasn’t a clean death and if there was any doubt the look of terror on the kid’s face drives the point home. This is a moment that could be played really dark and it would’ve worked. Not here though. This orphan’s terror turns into the audience’s chuckles and I fucking dig that. I promise you, you won’t get a better laugh out of a brutal decapitation than you will while watching Dear God No!.
All in all, would I recommend this film? You bet your sweet ass I would! It looks good, it’s a fun ride, and there’s plenty of the red stuff; basically Dear God No! ticks all of my boxes. Writer/director James Bickert knows how to make some damn fine smut and you’d be missing out if you don’t check it out.
AMAZON HOT BOX
Amazon Hot Box follows Penny, an innocent college student who ends up in a South American jungle prison ran by the sadistic Nazi wardress Inga Von Krupp. She has to find the strength to stay alive in the face of the sadistic wardress, psycho prisoners, voodoo experiments, and a torture machine. At the same time, pot smoking good ol boy Jett Bryant is caught up in political bullshit and is forced to become president of this lawless island and must avoid being assassinated by an American shadow intelligence group.
I’ve never watched any of the old school jailsploitation/women in prison flicks but I kind of want to after watching this one. I have a feeling I would be disappointed by them if I used Amazon Hot Box as my reference. I wasn’t super sure what to expect when I went into this one but what I got was a film that is at the same time gory, sexy as hell, and hilarious.
I heard about this movie at the same time that I heard about Dear God No! and then went and checked out the trailer. I was immediately interested and not just because of the sex and gore. I absolutely love Ellie Church; she was one of my favorite parts of Skeletons in the Closet so when I saw that she was playing a sadistic Nazi prison wardress in this movie it piqued my interest. After watching Dear God No! this morning, I knew that there was no way Amazon Hot Box would disappoint. I was right.
Sure, Penny is supposed to be the lead but the wardress and Jett Bryant were my favorite parts of the movie. She’s this over the top fascist torturer type who obviously takes great pleasure in extracting whatever information she can out of her prisoners. Jett just wants to grab some herb and go the fuck home which is, I think, something we can all relate to. Dude almost gets killed multiple times but never lets it get him down. Honestly, his sense of humor is what took this movie from good to great for me.
What else does this movie have to offer? Well, I’ll tell you. Fraulein Von Krupp loves torture so goddamned much that she built a torture machine that can steadily inflict pain and keep a prisoner alive and alert for up to a year at a time. That’s some serious pain. You only get to see the machine do its thing a couple times but it’s magnificent both times. Most of the fights in this flick are well done and when they aren’t they’re funny as hell so it doesn’t matter. There’s an undead voodoo zombie in a cell, which is pretty cool. There’s also an experiment involving what I can only describe as nymphomaniac murder gas. There’s also lots of lesbian action, as you’d expect.
All in all, would I recommend this movie? You bet your last taco I would. It’s a brilliant combination of violence, blood, gore, voodoo, and sex. If that isn’t enough for you to check it out I don’t know what to tell you. Not only would I recommend this film, I’d recommend anything directed by James Bickert; I’ve only seen two of his films but I have a feel for his style and I fucking love it. Do yourself a favor and go get you some of this fine 35mm smut.
Like I said, these movies are definitely lighter than what I’ll usually put on here but it just goes to show that “extreme” is a wide subgenre that includes all kinds of films. Just because a movie doesn’t make you question your morals and give you a feeling of existential emptiness doesn’t mean it’s not Fucked Up.